Wednesday..

Wednesday you could have been a little nicer to me....just saying.

I'm convinced itunes hates my guts. I can buy songs no problem from my phone...but I can't plug my phone into the computer and be recognized when I open itunes..so at this point I can't transfer anything over.. grr..I love my iphone and hate itunes..why can't the two of them get along with me?

13 days left with the preschool kiddos. oh boy. The time is coming rapidly to a close and I still can't believe we are that close. Plus the fact that 13 days will still take 4 weeks...but still ;) Next week is our last 4 day school week. This has been a rough year...full of changes at school. I'm ready for a new chapter in my life right now that does not hopefully involve children. But who knows what I'm going to end up with when I make it to California..

Just short and sweet today...I still hate itunes...i guess I'm falling asleep to the computer and not the phone tonight..

Wednesday Weigh in Week 88

Lots can happen in a week.

So I pretty much haven't worked out since last Wednesday. I have been trying my best not to get sick. And with two people on antibiotics in my house, that hasn't been easy. And I have just been tired. Plain and simple. Or my head hurts or my back hurts. Or both. I have been going to bed super early. And sleeping in. And now it's back to work. So I'm really needing to find a balance of working out and life. Oh and I got registered for my first college class ever. So yeah.

But now sitting here, my head is pounding and I've been up since 4:30 this morning. SO good night all! Here's to a new week!

Wednesday Weigh in week 75

75 weeks. That's all it took for me to gain all my weight back. grr. Yep. The weigh in that didn't happen last week was just a sign of what was to come this morning. But who am I kidding. With the move and not having time to make my lunches, combined with eating out EVERY day this month. I'm pretty sure I did. Sodium up the roof? And oh ya know two coffees a day. I'm not surprised at this gain at all. My survival mode kicked in and it wasn't nice. I'm really looking forward to summer where I can stay home and make lunches and no eat at DQ every day. I mean. I'm getting pretty sick of ice cream right now. And that right there folks is an amazing statement for me to say.

I could throw the towel in. I could delete my blog, and just convince myself that I will always be fat and things won't change and live my life this way, hating myself for the weight and just being miserable.

But I have always believed that by finishing what I start with my weight loss that it will transpire over into every area of my life. Even by moving, I am just downsizing so so much. I told my aunt the other day that if it doesn't have a significant meaning in my life and its not on display somewhere in my house then I am not keeping it. I mean obviously there are just some things that I have to keep for taxes, but a lot of stuff I just don't need. Along with getting my weight under control this summer, I am going to be organizing and downsizing more stuff. I have gotten good about getting rid of things, but for some reason I hang on to paper items forever. And that's my goal in the 11 weeks that I am off, is going through tubs of things that I don't want to be holding onto, and high kicking my butt back to where it should be. I know I should be happy now but I am not. I can't be. I won't ever be happy knowing that I am still almost 130 pounds overweight.

That's my vent. I know I won't be putting it off forever, and even if I can just find one thing to change by next week, I would be doing better. I've got two more weeks to get everything out of the other house. And then I get to actually enjoy my new house instead of trying to cram as much in as possible ;)

Wednesday weigh in Week 74

A funny thing happened on the way to today's weigh in...

It didn't happen.

I got my scale out of my bedroom, and put it on the floor and stepped on it, and it didn't turn on. I think I had set some stuff on top of it when I put it away last week and it must have left the battery going....so at any rate I think the battery died. I've never had that happen and so naturally I didn't have batteries on hand for it. And the screw driver to unscrew the spot.

So I didn't weigh in. Which I guess isn't a bad thing. I was very worried about my weigh in anyway. LOL. So I guess not seeing a number wouldn't depress me any. And it's just been rough moving this month. I haven't had time to cook my lunches, so I've been eating out every day for the last 3 weeks. I'm really sick of Dairy Queen by the way. Dang them and their $5 dollar lunch ;) And coffee has been my friend. And I've slowly seen the scale creep back up. And I really wasn't looking forward to the number today.

So lo and behold it didn't happen. I think I'm at my breaking point physically. I'm back to being unable to do things. Like kneel down or squat. Even walking up the stairs is giving me trouble. I'm achy and itchy and uncomfortable in my clothes. And I haven't seemed to have found the "re-motivating" factor. Like all of that won't do it for me? I don't really know. I guess I'm just super stubborn in that area. I can't have someone tell me what to do. I have to do it myself, and figure it out myself. I'm weird like that. I have to do it myself when it comes to working out. I guess if I'm super excited I will do it with friends. But I kinda prefer to do it solo? I'm odd I guess. Of course who am I kidding. I haven't worked out in months! I definitely de-railed a while back and I haven't been able to get back on course. I'm off work in 2 weeks for 11 weeks (Hello Summer break!!) and I'm hoping to use that time to get back into my groove and get going. I've got to get myself into a routine again. One that I can figure out how not to break when my life gets super crazy.

Because I know it will. :0)

Back troubles...

And 4 days into to my two week workout challenge....

I am sitting here with an ice pack on my back. This morning as I leaned in to get something out of the freezer and tried to stand up. Well I couldn't stand up. My back locked up and has been in pain since. I can't sit, I can hobble at most, and I can stand but it's uncomfortable. I hate how this seems to happen when I get serious about working out. I'm wondering if it's BECAUSE of some of the strength training workouts that I have just started doing. Maybe I'm doing them wrong? Or maybe it was the 38 "squats" I did in a minute yesterday at a work training that we were pretending to be like kids and see how long a minute was? We were sitting down and standing up from our chairs. Yeah. I'm pretty sure that was a squat. At any rate. I'm injured. 3 workouts and 4 days into my plan.

This wasn't my plan.I was telling my co-worker the whole list of things that I had to do today. the bank, the store, the post office, and the ups store. Not to mention the things I have to do the rest of the weekend.

Rest just wasn't in my plan. But maybe that's God's funny little way of telling me it is in my plans. I guess some of the other things will have to wait. Someone else might have to go after the bread. The ups and post office will have to wait until Monday. Unless I'm feeling amazingly better tomorrow.

Maybe it's time for that book...maybe it's time for that sermon...maybe it's time to rest...

Wednesday weigh in week 65

It's funny how a week goes by so so quicky! Happy first day of spring :0)

I've done two days of my two week little workout thing and let me tell you. Whatever 5 strength training things I did yesterday made me sore :0) So that was a good thing! Lol..but its Wednesday and I came home from work late and I have somewhere to be and already am trying to talk myself out of working out. Haha..So I think I am going to leave worship practice a little early so I can come home and get it done. And take a benadryl and go to bed. The wind is driving me absolutely crazy. And it made my ear hurt today. So yeah. Workouts are getting done, food choices could be better. But that lovely time of the month is approaching. ;)

So here I was thinking I had lost weight this week when in reality I gained it. See Sentence above previous sentence ;) But I have lost about half a pound since Monday when I started "being good" again. So THAT's good! But I hadn't realized I had actually gained almost two pounds until I looked at my weight from last week. Oh well. It just fluctuates so much it's crazy. But I am looking forward to jumpstarting getting back working out. And I haven't had dairy for the last 3 days so that's an improvement. I have been eating bread simply because I don't really know what else to have for breakfast right now. But for the most part I have backed off. And I haven't had coffee since Sunday! Oh boy. I'm gonna be breaking out the Excederine tomorrow I think! I do have a slight headache right now. But that could be due to a lot of things.

Ugh. The wind! Welcome to spring in the Tri-Cities!

Wednesday Weigh in Week 59

Oh boy. This hasn't been a very good week. I've fallen out of the habit of taking my vitamins again and I think it's starting to show. I've been really tired, so what do I do? get coffee. Yeah. Bad. And Monday night I ate at Olive Garden. yeah. My throat closed up :( So naturally when I ate the leftovers on Tuesday it did the same thing. Except I was at work. And I can't exactly take a benadryl at work and go to sleep. So I just pushed through. And maybe had some coffee ;)

And to top it all off I haven't worked out at all since running the 5k in January. boy oh boy am I on a streak ;)

Anyways. I don't have a whole lot to report right now. Well we are doing a 10,000 step challenge this month at school. We are tracking our steps during the week and writing them down. I've discovered I walk a lot during the day. I've hit over 10,000 every day since Monday. No wonder I am so tired by the time I get home from school. It's going to be interesting to see tomorrows numbers since we don't have kids and I will be in a meeting and sitting most of the day.

So I am wearing my fitbit again. Except it's on the verge of death. I can't see the numbers anymore so I have to log onto the computer to see my steps. Which kind of makes the digital pedometer useless. So hopefully I will win one of the ones they are giving away at work! That would be fun.

Wednesday weigh in week 56

Well that was two short lived weeks :( I lapsed this weekend. I guess you could say it was a "yeah, I will eat the stuff I said I wasn't going to". Mainly dairy. I had some mozzarella sticks and ranch. Plus I pretty much haven't exercised in a week again. And Wham! On goes almost 4 pounds. Really? Dairy will up my weight that fast? It's kinda crazy to think that. I mean that would mean I would literally have to avoid ALL of it. And we use so much in our cooking it's just crazy. Sour cream, cheese, milk, cream cheese. It all makes excellent additives to the food we eat. So now trying to avoid it is just downright awful. Not going to lie. It really kinda sucks. So here we are 3 weeks into the new year now, and I'm a little disappointed. Disappointed that I didn't say no to the cheese when I should have, and disappointed that I didn't make the time to workout. If it wasn't so goshdang cold!! I have come to realize that as much as I want to think that I can go run on the treadmill over at my grandma's house, I can't. It hurts me more I think running on the treadmill then it does running outside. My knees and my back were almost instantly hurting on the treadmill, still, once I figured out the incline. So maybe I was just made to run outside? But running in feels like 9 degree weather? Oy vey. I'm gonna have to get really disciplined for that one...

Happy New Year!

2013. Wow. I for one am incredibly ready for a new year! I am ready for a fresh start for sure. The tale end of last year was just a tough one. And while I learned a lot about myself, I didn't quite accomplish my goals. It makes me rather hesitant to make goals for 2013, but I know if I don't have a goal that I won't accomplish much. I had a goal of losing 100 pounds last year and I lost 12. And I'm not going to let it take 10 more years to lose the 100+ pounds that I want to lose. So I know for sure the goal this year is to lose more than 12 pounds and keep it off :0) I know that I want to have some fitness and food goals this year. But I haven't figured out what. I know food wise my main goal this year is to actually quit eating all the foods that I am allergic to.Which sounds so easy to SAY. But not so easy to do. Cause gosh dang it. I really wanted an ice cream sundae at dinner tonight for my dessert. This no milk thing is for the birds. Or eggs. I have pretty much accepted the peanuts. Luckily I won't be going into shock if I eat them on accident. Well maybe after not eating them for almost 6 months I might. But I'm just not going to go down that route. I did have a few episodes of my throat closing up last year, but I couldn't pinpoint what it was.

So I had an idea of having a goal of running a 5k every month. But then I thought that was a little silly because after I get trained for Bloomsday I will be running more than that every time I go running. I'm still toying around with the idea. It would be interesting to see my time change over the year as I get faster. I might still do that.

I know I want to do Bloomsday in May. That's a 12k. And that's really all I have planned for this year. If something else presents itself this year that would be great :)

And I'm pretty sure I am ready for slightly warmer weather ;) Running when it's 34 and slightly snowing just isn't a whole lot of fun. But at least I still made it out there to run. Not that we are just getting into winter or anything, but I hope it stays a bit warmer for my runs. None of this 20 degree high stuff!

OH! I got a pedicure today. First time in almost a year. They hurt, but I think they might help. I might have to start doing them more often :( As much as I don't really have the money for them, I think they are going to be helpful to my feet during this whole training thing :)

Really rambling today..Not so direct with my goals, but I am going to give it some thought before I settle on them I think :0)

Wednesday weigh in week 49

49!! Oy vey! This year is rapidly coming to a close. And I am nowhere near where I wanted to be. Nevertheless I shall keep going.

I have been sick again for the last week. It started the very day we got off for Thanksgiving break. Although if I think about it I was starting to get sick before then. Just didn't realize it. I basically slept 12 hours every night, Wednesday through Saturday. And then woke up in the middle of the night on Saturday and Sunday. Sometimes you can sleep too much and the NyQuill won't work :( I have also had a low grade fever, which made me go into the doctor. 5 minutes and he decides it's "viral". Which is why I hate going to the doctor. Thank you for taking my money and telling me that. No. Really. Grrrrrr. Now I feel worse and don't have the money to go back to the doctor! That's what I get for going to the doctor too soon I suppose. See what I get for trying to be proactive?

So there is this teacher at work who has lost a bunch of weigh this year. She happens to have the same lunch that I do, and I was listening to them all talk today during lunch and they were asking her all sorts of questions. Like how much have you lost, what have you done...all those questions. Well she has lost 75 pounds since January. And all I kept thinking was man..That should have been me! I should be the one that people keep asking me what I have done. Just a moment I had today.

I don't know if it's all the medicine I've been taking or what, but my body is still retaining the weight. I mean sleeping so much over break, I ended up down at 222 again. But go figure it crept back up to 225 this morning. I haven't quite got it figured out yet. And it's irritating. But then again, so is this stupid recurring sinus infection. :(

Wednesday weigh in week 46

Well I realized I got buy and didn't recap my Bloomsday training last week. I actually skipped a workout. I ended up being sick that day and wanted to run but eventually decided against it. I took a total extra day of rest. I am hopefully getting back to feeling like a normal person. Except for when I stay up until 1:00 am on election day and get up 4 hours later :/ (I am EXHAUSTED right now..short post). I have a feeling I am going to switch up next week a little bit and trade my running day and cross training day. Monday is a holiday, so I don't have work. And I can go run that day and then cross train on Tuesday and it will be good :0) Which is what I ended up doing today. I was just so beat from only getting 4 hours of sleep and being on my feet all day that I decided to rest my legs and I will cross train on Friday which was supposed to be my rest day. :-) I'm glad I can be flexible and not beat myself up when I do things like that. Whew. So that's the current update on Bloomsday!

And I don't know where the ___ 3 pounds came on from, but it did. Not really liking a 3 pound gain right now. All I can say is my stomach feels like it is full of air, and has for a couple of days. So I guess I'm not surprised, but definitely irritated. Things will be changing in my food and they will be changing quite soon. I'm thinking I pretty much have to cut out all dairy and wheat/gluten again. I've been lax in those areas. And I'm pretty sure that's the cause of it. So I need to get back to serious over here. Which is probably gonna mean no more coffee again. I just have quite the love/hate relationship with coffee. I love it, well I love it with milk and syrup..but that's the problem. I don't love it with almond milk, or coconut milk. And I'm just scared to try soy milk. So I guess it means it will have to go bye bye again. Or at least move to a social thing. Where I could have it once in a while while I'm out with a friend. But not every day like I have been. Plus it's just an added money cost that I simply don't have right now. Crazy as it seems, I should spend the money that I spend on coffee every month and spend it on real foods ;) or Vitamins even ;) What a thought! I think I'm gonna phase it out by an every other day thing for right now. I only have a few grounds left. So yeah. Maybe someday I won't be allergic to milk anymore and I will be able to enjoy coffee again. But definitely decaf. If I start drinking it again it will have to be decaf. Whole other topic LOL!

oh yeah..I said short post huh? :0)

Wednesday Weigh in Week 45

Boy am I ever ready to put October behind me! Here's to November. Hoping for better results! Being sick wasn't too kind to me last week. I did manage to do all my workouts for my Bloomsday training, but I hit a wall on Monday. I came home slightly feverish, did my cross-training workout on the bike. I mean I didn't try to go too hard because I knew I wasn't feeling good. I went about 12 mph on there for half an hour. But right before bed my head started hurting, and when I woke up on Tuesday it was still hurting! So needless to say I made the decision to go to work AND not work out on Tuesday due a huge headache and way too much caffeine :( I really went back and forth on it. Because I knew if I missed just ONE workout that I would just want to quit and give up. I mean yeah. I worked all day today and then came home and went trick or treating with the boys. And you better bet I dang well counted that for my cross training tonight! I am stiff and sore LOL! But I will be back at it tomorrow. I haven't decided if I'm gonna try to do my week two runs 3 days in a row or just bag the first run. I'm pretty early into it, so I think it will be ok.

My brother's costumes were a big hit this year :) My engineer of a sister made them into Lego's. Think Indiana Jones and a robot Lego :) Everyone loved them and complimented them on them. :) They were much better than all the scary costumes I kept seeing. I have to say Halloween is my LEAST favorite holiday. I don't quite like the idea of sugaring up children like that, or necessarily agree with the Holiday.  I know I'm gonna have a bunch of cranky pre-schoolers tomorrow that's for sure. I just wish it were Friday already haha! But I guess tomorrow is close enough :) My pre-schoolers don't come on Friday, so we like to think of Thursday's as Friday in my class :0)

Sometimes I feel like it's hard having goals in weight loss because I never feel like I accomplish them. So I didn't lose two pounds this week :( So does that mean I'm not going to get to 199 by the end of the year? I don't know? It's just so hard to focus and be so determined during the holidays. I feel like Halloween kicks that off and now it's like downhill to the end of the year! I mean I have 8 weeks. At that point I will have to lose 3 pounds a week to meet that goal. It just doesn't feel attainable :( But I keep going. Even if I get back down to 210 or 205 even that's still a 35 pound loss for the year. And that's still a good thing :0)

Up to my eyeballs

I have come to a realization that I don't want to post here unless I have positive things to say. Haha. And my life hasn't exactly been a bed of roses lately. So I think I have refrained from writing, because I don't want it sound like I feel like my life has been a bit of a mess. But it has, so I guess it's just time to quit thinking about that.

I have about had it up to my eyeballs this last week. With my mom having to go back to the doctor, to my grandpa passing away the same day, and then I had my sister in law in the emergency room TWICE with pain they couldn't figure out. Needless to say, I'm physically tired, emotionally tired and I'm ready for a break.

And I'm tired of food! That's a sign right there that I have just eaten so dang much lately. But isn't food the universal comfort when someone passes away? The thing that brings everyone together. Or drowning your sorrow in food? I think I'm beyond that point. Not quite ready to quit eating everything! LOL ;) I do like food. Just not right now.

I chopped my hair off this week. It's funny how you start to see patterns in your life. When things start to get kind of bad and I start to feel the signs and signals of depression, I chop my hair. Because well it needed it for one thing. But it's some sort of self appreciation thing? Usually when I get depressed it has something to do with my appearance. And by cutting my hair it makes me start to feel better about how I feel. So I found a wonderful new hairdresser who spent an hour and 15 minutes with me, teaching me how to style( ie blow dry) my hair and I ended up with a hairstyle that I didn't have to wash for 2 days! That was kind of nice. Until I blow dryed my hair today for the first time and realized I didn't have the little piece to go on my blow dryer to control the airflow. The piece I had went to my last blow dryer. :/ Dang it. Looks like I will be getting a new blow dryer soon if that's the case. I so happy that I found someone who knows how to cut short hair. I actually came out of there looking the closest to a picture that I took in.

My big thing this week is practicing the song I get to sing at my Grandpa's funeral on Saturday. He wanted Amazing Grace sung. Not sure the way that I'm gonna sing it ;) But I think it will be a good thing :) Now I just have to not look at any family member while singing it, so as to not start crying in the middle of it :) I worked on it a little bit after church today, but since I really haven't sang the song in 4 years, I'm a little rusty on it. :) Will be spending lots of time in my room singing this week HAHA!

The seasons are changing around here. Which seems to be a perfect time to make changes in other things. The next change I need to make is to start working out again. My knee has been killing me. Which shows me I've gained too much weight back and it's way beyond time to get serious again...

Wednesday Weigh in Week 40

eeh. .6 pounds up today. I'm gonna be pretty honest. It's that time of the month for me as a girl. It's always a fun one when it comes on weigh in day. Not. Or the fact that I ate a box of girl scout cookies in two days. Or the coffee I'm having. Or maybe the ice cream. Yeah. I'm not really good at discipline right now. And I am starting to see the toll. Like the mini emotional breakdowns in my closet because I got rid of all my "bigger" clothes and now since I've been gaining weight again none of my clothes fit. It makes me wonder sometimes where the mutilate your own body by shoving massive amounts of food in it came in to play. Like who thinks of these things? How did it come to be? And how in the world did it start to become my pattern? Why did food become my turn to instead of God? I have never ever been one of the kind to starve myself or make myself throw up. But I can shove it down like no one's business. Which is quite frightening  to think of after watching a Dr Oz show on binge eating. And how to stomach grew and they showed an x-ray of it. I freaked out. But it didn't quite stop me from eating. Although. I don't know if I would actually put me in the category of binge eating. I don't know. I usually don't sit and eat large quantities at one time. It's more like just eating all throughout the day. So it's kind of weird.

Honestly life is kind of hard right now. I've got my Mom recovering from surgery. I don't know if I've been the greatest help around this time, but I'm doing what I can. And I have to face the truth of the fact that I have another family member dying. The cancer has returned. The end is inevitable. I haven't had to face this road since 8 years ago when my Dad passed away from cancer. And you know what. I'm not looking forward to it. And food, like always is once again my coping mechanism. My I don't want to deal with this right now, so I'm going to just eat whatever the crap I want to to numb myself and make all the pain go away.

And the hardest part is knowing what I need to do and then simply not doing it. I know I need to make "me" time. The time where I tell everyone no and go do my working out. But I can only handle a dirty kitchen for so long, and there are times where I just have to cook dinner, and well there you go again. Yo yo up..yo you down.

So there's the ugly part of weigh loss. The part where it's not even happening. The part where I'm really just trying to make it through the day. And if that includes two lunches. Or 2 coffees a day it might happen. But eventually I have to get it back to an hour-long workout, a sense of accomplishment and about more 100 pounds gone.

And that's the balance I haven't been able to find yet.

Wednesday weigh in week 30

Oh crap really? Week 30? That's a lot! So I've seen this number before. I'm two pounds down from last week. This long weekend of eating soft foods is just about killing me! I'm ready for real food. And apparently I can't have it! Haha. It was interesting after finding out the allergy results, and then getting my teeth pulled and then pretty much only eating foods I was allergic to, and watching my body react. Sure enough, about 2 days after the surgery, my throat is hurting, and my throat is all red and splotchy. So I reluctantly put the pudding and ice cream away and have tried to stay away from the dairy. I was a good girl yesterday and didn't eat the scrambled eggs we had with dinner. Those kinds of things. I did manage to eat some spagetti noodles tonight with a bit of hamburger in the sauce.

I have a feeling this is just gonna be one great lesson on learning how to cook. I mean if I am going to have to modify all my recipes then I better be learning how to make these things right? It takes a lot more time and effort to cook healthy then it does to eat crap that's for sure.

So I don't know if I mentioned it, but I bruised pretty good about the 3rd day after my surgery. It looks like someone clocked me on both sides of my chin. All in all it's not horrible. I'm just surprised it took so long to happen. I'm definitely ready for these stitches to come out and I can eat some more substantial food here. I can only eat so much applesauce, bananas and gluten free waffles!

Wednesday weigh in week 19

Ok. So let's just be completely honest and real here. My mom is in the hospital having some surgery done today. And two weeks ago when this mess all started I just kinda had a to heck with it moment, and I've been downhill since then. Yes I have been "carb-loading" and not in a good way. I am not to be trusted with donuts in the house. At all. And I've been to DQ a couple of times for some tasty blizzards. Or frozen yogurt. I haven't been able to be consistent in my working out. And sorry guys, but my cycle has thrown me all out of whack. All of this means 7 pounds gained in two weeks. Hmmmmmmm. I'm still pretty sure that not all of it is actual weight, or just water or bloating or whatever.

And I am most likely gonna have to be switching my workouts around for the next 6 weeks until Mom is fully recovered.

Needless to say it's always a fight for something. And even if my head is telling me that it wants to quit and give up and keep eating gluten and dairy and carbs, my heart is gonna win this battle. I refuse to live the rest of my life like this. And so the battle rages on.

Happy Wednesday...

Oh yeah!! Let's end on a happy note!! I have been borrowing Katie's garmin, and I have run with it 3 times now. This week I started bumping up my miles. I am up to 3.5 miles at a time. I found a great new path to go on and it's been interesting to see the difference between the garmin and my mapmyrun app. It's about .04 to.10 of a mile and about 20 seconds to 30 seconds difference in the average pace. All in all, its not too bad. On the one hand it's remembering to charge another thing before I run. On the other hand, it's nice to look down and see what my mileage and time is and not have to drag out the phone and unlock it and get it put away..Christmas present to myself maybe? ;)

cravings

Ok let's be real here. I have been at this for over a month. Good news! I lost 14 pounds! Bad news. I now would like to eat everything that I haven't eaten in the past month. You know. bread. ritz crackers. CHEESE. milk (more than the little bit in my coffee in the morning). Ice cream. pretzels. Bagels. Desserts. More than one coffee a day. Adjusting to life without those has been pretty good until this last week or so. I don't know if it's because I did have some more carb-y stuff on my birthday which led to my body thinking it needed it all or what? I want it ALL. And I want it now! LOL! I just know that even peanut butter is getting boring to me. And finding a sugar free, gluten free, dairy free, yeast free dessert is hard. The gluten free cookies I made were quite yummy, but they did have sugar in them. So it's not something I want to incorperate a lot into my diet until I feel like the candida is gone.

So far I haven't really seen much improvement on my toenails. Which I wasn't really expecting to see right away because toenails grow out really slow. I was kind of hoping some miracle would happen and by next month my toenails would look amazing again in time for the wedding that I am in. We are wearing flip flops. In March. Sadly I think I will be getting a manicure when everyone else gets a pedicure. I am not ready for someone to be touching my feet yet. It's just not fair to them I don't believe.

Just some minor complaining :) I mean really all in all, it's not that bad. It's just relearning to eat a completely different way. Which can be hard. But in the end after I have lost all my weight it will be worth it :)