75 weeks. That's all it took for me to gain all my weight back. grr. Yep. The weigh in that didn't happen last week was just a sign of what was to come this morning. But who am I kidding. With the move and not having time to make my lunches, combined with eating out EVERY day this month. I'm pretty sure I did. Sodium up the roof? And oh ya know two coffees a day. I'm not surprised at this gain at all. My survival mode kicked in and it wasn't nice. I'm really looking forward to summer where I can stay home and make lunches and no eat at DQ every day. I mean. I'm getting pretty sick of ice cream right now. And that right there folks is an amazing statement for me to say.
I could throw the towel in. I could delete my blog, and just convince myself that I will always be fat and things won't change and live my life this way, hating myself for the weight and just being miserable.
But I have always believed that by finishing what I start with my weight loss that it will transpire over into every area of my life. Even by moving, I am just downsizing so so much. I told my aunt the other day that if it doesn't have a significant meaning in my life and its not on display somewhere in my house then I am not keeping it. I mean obviously there are just some things that I have to keep for taxes, but a lot of stuff I just don't need. Along with getting my weight under control this summer, I am going to be organizing and downsizing more stuff. I have gotten good about getting rid of things, but for some reason I hang on to paper items forever. And that's my goal in the 11 weeks that I am off, is going through tubs of things that I don't want to be holding onto, and high kicking my butt back to where it should be. I know I should be happy now but I am not. I can't be. I won't ever be happy knowing that I am still almost 130 pounds overweight.
That's my vent. I know I won't be putting it off forever, and even if I can just find one thing to change by next week, I would be doing better. I've got two more weeks to get everything out of the other house. And then I get to actually enjoy my new house instead of trying to cram as much in as possible ;)
{{hugs}} I'm here to support you when you're ready to get it done, Dena!!
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