Wednesday weigh in Week 104

Well. I've made the decision that I will no longer be doing Wednesday Weigh ins.  In fact this is going to be my last Wednesday Weigh in because heck...who really wants to weigh themselves on Christmas morning!

The other morning I was coaching a friend, when really I was preaching to the choir like I like to do so well. She was scared about getting to her goal weight and then worried about gaining it all back. She has done amazing and really has like 2 or 3 pounds to go before hitting goal. Maintenance scares her. I spent some time telling her that the number on the scale doesn't define her. She can't live her life in fear of gaining all her weight back because that's what will happen. We go where we look. So if all she is doing is living in fear of gaining it back then that's what she will do. But if she lives her life and stays within her points and works out to maintain what she has lost, well then barring any weird medical reasons she should be fine. To LIVE. To not be obsessed over the scale and food. You know. That sort of pep talk :0)

And then I spent the next hour applying this to my life. I'm pretty sure we do the best thinking in the bathtub right? And that's where I decided it was time to be changing this blog up. I've been blogging for 2 years now. Pretty faithfully at least once a week. ;) And well I think I've gained and lost and gained and lost and somehow I think I am about 3 pounds heavier than what I started with 2 years ago. So posting my weight isn't really doing anything for me right now. Weight loss isn't really happening. And my life seems to be suffering.

So I'm taking the year off.

I went this summer without weighing myself. And I really enjoyed it. Haha..of course. I learned that I still need accountability. But it was nice to not feel like I was controlled by the number on the scale.

So my rough draft plan is to weigh myself on the 31st of December 2013, and then not weigh myself again until January 1, 2015. (WOAH. I just wrote that! That seems weird).

Now do I expect to lose weight. Oh absolutely.

But what I want to really do is shift my life around. I have spent much of my adult life OBSESSING over losing weight. I have let it control every aspect of my life on whether I do or don't do things,and  on who I think of myself as. I see the number on the scale. I see the fat girl. I see someone who at times I can't stand to be around so why should anyone else. I have become so inwardly focused on losing weight that I really haven't done much else with my life.

So that's what 2014 needs to be about. Re-prioritizing my life.

That doesn't mean that I'm not going to forgo exercising and learning how to eat healthier. Those are very much going to be goals. They just aren't going to be the focus of my life. I'm going to sit down and make some monthly goals of things that don't pertain to weight and I want to do what my blog is all about: Finishing what I start. It's more than weight. I need to learn how to get myself off of the foods that I'm allergic to. I need to figure out how to get my toenails cleared up. I need to figure out how to lower my debt so I can move out into my own apartment. I need to figure out a schedule so I can continue going to school and getting a degree.

There is more to life than weight loss. And I am going to spend my 2014 doing that. So the blog will be different in January. Opening my life up to other goals that I need to accomplish. I might be a little more boring. Or I might not...you never know ;) It's time to restart life without a scale. Without my life depending on that number. Now I might go the whole year and not lose anything. Well that would suck. Not gonna lie. But if I end up happier and mentally healthier than that would be worth it in the end. I wanna see some goals checked off my list next year. And I believe that this is the way to do it. Some things happen for a season. And there might be a season when Wednesday weigh ins come back. And that would be great. Or it might be retired for good. Who knows. I have a year to figure that out.

Can you lose weight long term and not weight yourself? I have no idea. But I'm about to find out. It's going to be an interesting year for sure. But I am looking forward to it. I'm ready for a change, and I think this will be good for me.

So stick around and see what happens? :0)

Wednesday Weigh in week 102

Boy I am ready for a new week haha! I think it comes with not actually working a whole lot during the month of November..and then going to 3 straight weeks of kids every day. It's a little tiring. Then you throw in life and school and church and all that. Let's just say I stayed in bed until 6:30 this am and that's reaaaaaaallly pushing it. I was so warm and cozy in my bed however. I looked at my phone and I'm just not a big fan of this 10 degrees and feels like 2. We finally had indoor recess today. Simply because even at 25 degrees it's no fun for a preschooler to go outside. So we did indoor stuff.

Not gonna lie..the first couple times I weighed myself today I didn't want to take a picture. But I finally got it to say 247.8 haha...twice. So that's what I'm going with. Some day my brain will register that I want to be skinny more than I want coffee. Or sodium. Yep. That's what I'm gonna go with.

Other than that I don't have too much to report this week. I'm super busy, so I'm super tired. I'm gonna take some melatonin and go to bed early tonight...something I keep saying I'm going to do and then don't actually do...But it's a goal...I'm going to be in bed very very soon :0)

Wednesday weigh in week 101

Well that was an interesting week! I felt very encouraged by the feedback that I got from some people on my post. I haven't posted my updates on facebook in a while, really because I haven't really been losing weight, and while yes, I still post....I just know it will only be a few people that read it. Yet I still get on here every Wednesday and post haha!!

Let's see. I got up early on Saturday and got all ready for my water aerobics class and got to the gym for them to tell me that the pool had flooded and classes had been cancelled until they got it fixed. Of course I got lots of good ribbing...um how does a pool flood? But I'm still proud of the fact that I got myself up and got to the gym..whether or not I got a workout in. And no I didn't have any other workout gear with me...I was in my swimsuit and flip flops...so I went home and showered and got on with my busy day ;) I mean I wasn't too horribly mad. I'm just getting myself into the routine of actually getting up and getting myself there...and I think it will all fall into place. I had to pretend to study for my test that I took this morning.

Sunday we had a Thanksgiving meal with our church after service..That's always fun :) I'm not to keen on potlucks because I don't really know what's in the things that people make and whether or not I'm allergic, but I did get some turkey and rice and jello and a roll.

Monday night I finally sat down and looked at the study guide for my college assessment test. I promptly freaked out and had all sorts of anxiety, pulling out my eyelashes and eyebrows and wanting to eat everything in sight. People. Math is just never going to be my friend. Don't ask me to do geometry or trig..It's just not going to happen.

Tuesday night I did my Final Presentation in my Early Childhood Education class. Well actually I had to do 2 presentations haha..but the little one I wasn't too worried about. The lesson I learned was that I need to follow up when I send something to the Teacher to print. Needless to say our songs are going to be passed out next week...;) Now I just have to finish up my songbook to turn in next week and I am officially done with my first quarter as a college student!

Which leads me to today: My dreaded COMPASS test, haha...I mean lets be real here...I graduated in 1999. So that means I really haven't done math since oh 1997? No seriously. I barely got through Algebra. And probably with a C or something..I mean I really don't remember. But somewhere along the road of life, I dumped math out and put music in. I mean that's what everyone does right? So this pretest stuff had me so worried..I slept like crap last night..But made it to my test and even got it! (I was a walk in, so people had to not show up for me to do the test). Needless to say I came out of the test with a college level in Reading and Writing. And I got into Math 84. Which is not college level ;) But the Math class that I needed to make it into. Luckily I have friends that are good at math..and we will probably be setting up some tutoring dates in the near future when I get into my Math class...I'm hoping it will be offered over the summer...that would be a good time while I'm not working to be able to do that...anyways..I'm so glad it's over with and now I can get registered for some more ECE classes...after I fill out my FASFA again and get some financial aid! Cause I can't pay for college myself! Haha!!

I'm still hovering right around the same weight..I'm suspecting it's the sodium and milk. I got pretty busy last week and only got one workout in. And this week, well I'm just not going to be doing any workouts in the pool...and that's all I'm gonna say about that. But I'm super glad the pool is back up and I will be in class for sure on Monday night...not so sure about Saturday.

I do know that Thanksgiving is not super tempting for me..Never really has been. Let's see..I will eat turkey, mashed potatoes, rolls, and some jello. Well I did buy a dulche de leche cheesecake thing to make..That just might put me over the edge! Haha..but I've never been into all the sides and stuff..I don't even like gravy! I'm not a big overeater on Thanksgiving..I don't even like pumpkin pie! And I'm not big on fruit pies either. And once the peanut butter and chocolate went away, well what do you know...Christmas is another story however...I will devour those almond bark covered pretzels like nobody's business..

I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving!!

Wednesday weigh in week 100

Wow. 100 weeks makes it seem so long. I feel like I've been doing this for a long time. Haha..But then again I have. Almost two years. Scary to think that I am back to my highest weight again after two years. It makes me want to get all sad and melancholy just thinking about it. But I'm not going to. :0)

I just have to say. I am really loving my Aqua Cardio class. AKA Water Aerobics. Yes..You can sweat in the swimming pool. But after coming to class 3 times, the instructor has told me that she is really impressed with how well I am doing and keeping up. I seriously haven't taken any type of water aerobics class in about 10 years. And some of the moves I still struggle with, but I will get them figured out. And the people in the class are really nice and friendly. Ok. Not gonna lie, sometimes I'm the youngest one in the class...and it's fun being in with all the older crowd. And there are all types of people there. From skinny to ultra obese. From the teenager to the woman who literally brought her motorized wheelchair scooter thing into the pool area and parked it and got into the water. You know the thought never really crossed my mind that there would be a ton of obese people in the class. But there is. And yes I'm one of them. I'm pretty sure I'm classified as morbidly obese. I mean I need to lose 116 pound just to be at the very top end of the "normal" BMI range. I'm only 5'1 and I weight 248 pounds. Sometimes I really don't know how I function. But I do. And my goal really is to be around 115 pounds. It's always just been the number in my head. I mean probably somewhere between 115-118 probably...but still that means I need to lose almost 135 pounds. That's an entire person you know? I have 90 pounds to lose before I'm not even obese anymore. That's the real kicker. I have to lose almost 100 pounds before I'm not obese.

But I can't wait for that day. I dream about that day. Look forward to that day.

And then I sleep in. And only go the gym twice a week. (Hey THAT'S even an improvement!) And I drink milk in my coffee, and eat macaroni and cheese. And frosted sugar cookies from Heaven, or Hell depending on which way you look at it. ;) And mostly it's out of convenience. Trying to prepare healthy food is hard. And timely. And I really just got tired of eating lettuce and brown rice every day you know? So I'm still learning the balance of it all.

But I was super proud of myself on Monday. Not only did I go work all day, I then went straight to the college to meet with my Adviser to come up with a plan for me finally going to college. (yep 32, first time college student...hello!) I got in my car at 5:45 after my meeting...Well Aqua Cardio starts at 6. And it was almost 15 minutes away. Well I had a choice to make right there...I could have chosen to go home. Eat dinner. Relax, work on homework. Or I could have busted my butt to get to the gym and get to the class that was the whole reason I signed up for the gym.

I chose to go to the gym.I told myself in the car as I was leaving. "I need to make this my habit, make it my routine." I pulled in the parking lot at 5:56 I think. See I hate being late for things. I changed like Superman and I was in the water at 6:02. She was just barely starting the warm up routine and I worked out super hard. The instructor even commented after that class that she could tell I was working hard cause my cheeks were going red. And I just get super focused. Haha...I'm kinda competitive with myself :0) But with water aerobics its really sink or swim (hahahahahahaha). You don't really have someone really explaining moves to you. You just have to watch and learn (which can be really hard underwater I might add). But so far the teacher and students have been really great to help me and I have enjoyed throwing myself out there and jumping into to a situation I normally wouldn't.

I hate doing group things alone. I hate being late.And I always used to think that I don't really talk to strangers. But I do. And it's kind of weird.  But somehow I find myself in these situations where I'm by myself and I have to meet new people. But I guess you get over that in a swimsuit in a pool with 20-30ish other fat(ish)  people trying to take care of themselves. It's like a small little family that I am learning to be a part of. Some people will come and go, but I hope to be one of the ones who stick around for a while. Because I really like that hot tub ;)

The only thing about the class that I don't like is that I am STARVING about half an hour to an hour after I am done. I am pretty much not eating until 8:00 for dinner, after I have some time in the hot tub and then shower and blow dry my hair and stuff..so by then I'm pretty hungry. Sad to say after my second class I was hiding my pop tarts in the locker room praying that no one would see me to judge me haha..Baby steps..baby steps people...

So that's my week 100 update. Did I think that this was going to be where I wanted to be? Oh heck no. I wanted to be at my goal weight right now...Looking good with a whole new wardrobe. Maybe by week 200 that will be the case.

But for now, I'm just gonna celebrate small things, like a swimming pool and a hot tub...

Wednesday weigh in week 99

Wow...I've been at this for 99 weeks. Scary LOL! I wish I could say I've made my goal and all that jazz..but I haven't. It's a learning process for sure.

In great news! I made it to a water aerobics class finally. I learned that I don't want to eat dinner beforehand however. It's called Water cardio and it lives up to its name. I also learned I need to scoot down and not be in the shallow shallow end. It still hurt my knee some..so I got some tips from the instructor. Somehow telling the instructor and all the other people there that it's my plan to come every Monday night should help me get there right? Right. But I was secretly excited. She came by to show me how to do stuff and I had caught on pretty quick. She kept telling me I was a pro for it being my first time. I guess most new first timers struggle a bit. But I literally just jumped on in. And I was definitely sore from it yesterday. My goal is to be there Mondays and probably Saturday mornings. Who knew Saturdays had mornings right? ;0) Haha...But I joined the gym to be able to use the pool. And that's what I plan on doing. Speaking of that. I am going to sit down this week and make up a workout plan for the next 90 days. I will take a picture and post it before next week so you can see it. See now I have told you, and you will keep me accountable to that too :0)

In not great news I gained 1.2 pounds back. Not surprised with the way my tummy has been feeling lately...I think I'm a little ahem backed up. Makes all the difference in the world ;) Sad. but true.

This week has been an odd work week. Monday was a holiday. Tuesday I only worked half day. Tomorrow I work a half day and I'm taking Friday off. It was supposed to be our conference week, however my teacher has just gotten off jury duty. So now we have 19 conferences to reschedule, and not a whole lot of work to be done this week. But after the craziness of last week it was nice this week to have a break. I can't complain too much. I mean we do have Thanksgiving and Christmas Break coming up soon. I only work 15 days in December. Then we get two weeks off. So we really don't have a lot of time with the kids in the next 6 weeks. We only have 6 more days with them in November. SO yeah.. 21 days with the kids for the rest of the year. CRAZY! This year has gone by so so fast. Rather scary.

Wednesday weigh in week 98

Wednesday: No Excuses!!

Thursday: Massive sore throat/headcold/fever and taking Nyquil and Sudafed for the next 6 straight days.

Well that pretty much sums up my week, along with TOM. Yep. Hows that for no excuses?!? Hahahaa. Life is funny guys..so funny. I managed to go to bed without the nyquil last night but I'm still stuffy and took sudafed once today. And to top that all off my co-worker was also sick and could either one of us take a day off? Oh no. You know why? Because our teacher is serving on a jury for the next two weeks. Well this week and next week. Meaning we don't get to take time off. Haha. Good thing next week is conferences and we don't have kids. This has been the longest. week. ever. One more day with kids and then we are done. Whew. Some weeks I don't know how I get by. Oh yes I do. Coffee. :0) I was halfway good this week and had soy most of the time. I have thrown some milk in there in my iced coffees.

All in all I managed to lose 1.8 pounds this week. I mean really I'm an expert at losing and gaining the same two pounds. I mean yeah. I'm feeling quite sassy right now haha..I should really just shut my mouth and go to bed.

Well Katie officially freaked me out today in her post. She mentioned there was 11 1/2 weeks until her birthday and she was thinking of doing her virtual 5k again. Well my birthday just happens to be 3 days after hers. So my birthday is in 12 weeks roughly from today. C-R-A-P. Please Jesus I don't want to turn 33 weighing over 200 pounds. But losing 47 pounds in 12 weeks. Is that realistic? Nope. I don't think I can really justify or figure out how to lose 4 pounds a week. That's just not healthy. I really need to do a lot of reflecting soon on why I eat the way I do and what to help combat that. I'm also going to come up with a plan for going to the gym. I told a friend who is thinking of doing p90x for the 90 day challenge that I would make up my own challenge and do a 90 day thing with her. My birthday is in 82 days from today. So I wouldn't even be done with a challenge by then. But it's going to be good to come up with something. Oh geez. That makes me want to do it right now haha..But right now I need to be getting my little self in bed. I have one more day with kids this week...I can do this haha!!

At any rate. I'm getting back in the game. Mentally and physically. One of these days I'm going to make it to the water aerobics class. Which is part of the whole reason that I signed up for the gym in the first place! Haha..gotta make it happen :0)

Wednesday weigh in week 97

So I should have no excuses now. I made it to the gym and the trainer showed me how to properly use the machines and what to do. Now I just have things like pms or tiredness or busyness or a bum knee to entertain me haha. 

But I did make it to the gym twice last week. That's an improvement. But eating hasn't changed much yet so weight is still about the same. Only .4 heavier. But that time is coming ;) 

Wednesday weigh in week 96

Well I knew that magic wasn't going to last forever LOL!. The scale was back up today. I was actually quite frustrated because each time I weighed myself it said something different. So I said forget it and went back to bed! Literally. I called in sick today. After something to do every day and night for the last two weeks my body just couldn't take it anymore. I have been feeling crappy for the last several days. And I just stayed home and rested today. I did finally get the scale to say the same thing twice so that's what I went with. It was nice to have nothing to do today, but I will be back at the grind tomorrow. One of these days I'm going to make it to the gym that I joined that I haven't gone to yet! Haha. I did notice that it hasn't come out of my account yet either...so at least I didn't lose out on any money ;) My goal is to go at least 3 times a week. It's only 21 a month. So that doesn't seem all that bad to start out with. Bare minimum I want to at least go and sit in the hot tub tomorrow night! That's part of the reason I joined the gym in the first place!

But for me? I'm back to bed. I never did nap today so I'm ready to actually go back to sleep...and hopefully this time my brain will shut off enough and let me do it!

Wednesday Weigh in Week 94

Oh it's that pesky time of the month. You know...the time where you join the gym on Saturday and then can't make it to water aerobics on Monday. The one that causes you to gain a pound. Yeah. It's that time of the month. But luckily it was only a pound. Haha...

I swear the week just tends to fly by. And before I know it it's Wednesday again. And I haven't done any sort of weight loss attempt at all ;) LOL!

I'm looking forward to making a routine for the gym. To have set nights or times and just go. And having pool time. Haha...Maybe I'm just weird like that. I'm more excited about having a gym with a pool than I am about working out on the machines. Although I am excited about the machines too. I need to go back and get an appointment made for someone to show me how to use all the machines in the gym. That way I know what I need to be doing for each of them and I don't avoid machines because I don't know what the do. Needless to say I'm a little bit excited. :)

We made some yummy chicken alfredo tonight. Yes. It's out of a box. And yes it has milk and cheese in it. Did I mention it was yummy? And cheap. And I wanted to try it? And it has Velveeta? Yah yah yah. All those things I shouldn't have. Such is life. Dairy is a hard hard thing to get rid of completely. But not as hard as garlic :(

Sorry it's super short, It's late and I reaaallly need to get to bed.

Wednesday Weigh in Week 93

Well, I made it!

And my hunch was correct. I didn't lose anything this summer. In fact I gained about 4 pounds. I'm just glad that it was only 4 pounds. It does however put me back to only 3 pounds from my highest weight :( That's a little on the discouraging side. On the non discouraging side I am excited that I was able to break free from the scale for a while. I mean really I know I would have spiraled more had I noticed that I was gaining weight. But then again when I was doing so well working out in August I wonder if I did lose weight and that might have helped spur me on if I had seen the number dropping.

So here we go round the mullbury bush again. It's October now. And I would still like to set a weight loss goal for before my birthday in January. But first my goal is to kick my two coffees a day back to one, except maybe once or twice a week. And to get to the gym to join! That's my goal. I am definitely ready to get in the pool for some laps and to learn about the new gym I am going to sign up for.

Ignore the gross toes. I'm trying to work on that, and covering them up with toenail polish isn't doing them any good. Now that it's sock season no one has to see my gross toes. I'm hoping that I will get them cleared up by next summer!!

Wednesday Weigh in week 91 snd 92

No excuse.

Oh well. So I didn't come up with any recipes. And honestly not weighing myself has really thrown off my wednesday posts.  But next week I will be having a weigh in! My no scale summer ends on Monday. And then I will be resuming my weekly weigh ins. I'm actually pretty dang proud of myself. I really only "weighed" myself once this summer. And that was while I was at the beach on a scale at the museum telling you what you weighed on all the planets. So I mean I really didn't look too long and hard at it. But what I can say is that I don't feel like I have lost anything. I'm still in the same size of clothes and nothing feels different. So it's a double edged experience. Yeah for not being addicted to the scale. Boo for not feeling like I lost anything. But I will find out for sure on MONDAY when I weigh myself. I am pretty proud of myself for not weighing in. There were a few times this summer that I actually wanted to. But I held off. And I mean it's not like I hid my scale or anything. It's in the same spot in my room that it always is. And I haven't gotten on my sister's scale, which is just out in her bathroom when I have been taking care of her dogs while she has been gone. I just simply haven't done it. It's a bit of a self discipline lesson. I mean. Once I set my mind to some things I can be as stubborn as can be. I haven't quite figured that out with food though. I cave. All. the. time.

I'm toying with the idea of joining a gym. Me who hasn't worked out in weeks. Haha..But it's really only 21.00 a month. And get this...it has a pool and a hot tub! Um. Why wouldn't I do that? Especially for that cheap a month. I would be ok with only going 3 times a week for that price. It's not bad at all. It's a little further away, but it has a water aerobics class I can do one evening a week, and then I can do weights and stuff. I think both of my coworkers are going to join too, so it will be kind of fun :0) I'm a little excited at the thought of going back to a gym. Especially with a pool and hot tub!

And I officially started my first college class ever last night. Yeah I'm a late starter considering I'm 32 and everything..but I needed it for my job, so it's a continuing education of sorts. I'm taking an Early Childhood Education class. Music and Movement. I'm basically going to use it to see if I want to go back for the whole degree...It's gonna be interesting!

Oh and Stephanie :-) if you see this. I decided to join you in the redhead movement ;)

Wednesday weigh in Week 89 and 90

Yeah I'm a slacker.

Not really. But it's been super crazy busy the last couple of weeks and as I was falling into bed last Wednesday I realized I hadn't posted anything..So yeah.

Oddly enough I have been really wanting to weigh myself lately. And the stupidest thing is I know that I have gained weight. I can just feel it. I did so super great on those 3 weeks working out in August, and then it all fell apart in the last week and I haven't worked out much at all.

And right now its that time of the month, so I most certainly will not be getting on a scale.

It's kind of frustrating. I feel very much like I have failed again. By all means I should have lost weight during August. But my clothes are all the same. I don't feel lighter. I feel heavier. I tried on pants that were a size smaller than what I have been wearing. They didn't fit. I don't understand why I didn't lose anything.

So the only reason that I can come up with is food. I'm not gonna lie. I sneak food every now and again. But I certainly don't think it was enough to trainwreck 3 solid weeks of working out. So either I really need to make an appointment and go see a doctor about getting my thyroid checked, or there is something that I am eating (um hello dairy) that is keeping me bloated and unable to lose weight.

I feel like the last two weeks that my body has just been falling apart. My knee has been killing me. Randomly twinging just to make me catch my breath and almost fall over. My bones just ache. Random bones. Like right this very minute my arm between my wrist and my elbow just aches. Like a dull ache. And it just hurts to stand sometimes. And I have to think about it. Well duh. I'm really only 10 pounds away from my heaviest weight again. This all makes sense. It reminds me of what my body was like before I started losing weight. And then I really have to stop and think, well. Is this really dairy affecting me that bad? Is that the only reason that my body is like this?

You hear it all the time. Weight loss is more food related than workout related. And I seriously have always thought that if I would just work out that I would lose the weight. And honestly I really don't think I could have been overeating that much. Unless I seriously have no idea what is in my food.

But last night I was making dinner. And looked down into the pain. I was allergic to every thing in the pan. And I was making it to eat it. Why oh why does my body crave every thing I can't eat? I'm so terribly picky. I have such a hard time eating anyway. And now I have to seriously cut out 50-80 percent of my diet? I honestly don't know what to eat. And I honestly don't know how I will pay for it. I'm just tired of food in general. I don't have any desire to eat food. But I know I have to.

So in two weeks I can get on the scale again. It's been a thoroughly enjoyable summer not beating myself over the number on the scale. Luckily I'm not too attached to it. But I miss the routine of weighing myself. I wonder if I would have quit working out earlier than the 3 weeks if I had weighed myself and noticed I wasn't losing anything. I wonder if I wouldn't have made it to a 75 second plank. I know my body is capable of incredible things. It's just my mind that sabotages the majority of it.

So my goal this week is to find some new recipes that are dairy free. And to be serious about cutting back on the beef again. I have slacked on that one too. That allergy isn't a huge one..But I can tell the difference between when I only have it twice a week and when I overdo it. And that dang garlic is just so hard. I'm just learning to stay away from fresh garlic. Dried I can manage a little bit more. But the fresh stuff will get me instantly.

But it's mainly my beloved dairy. I'm really quite over the milk. The only thing I miss it is in my coffee. But cheese. And cream cheese. and cottage cheese. and cream of chicken soup. And ICE CREAM. To think of not ever eating that again just makes me instantly depressed.

But I suppose somewhere down the line it will just click. After not having it I would hope my body would just one day realign itself and I won't crave it anymore. Because let me tell you. My body was so not so happy with me after last night's dinner. Oh. Boy.

It's back around the mountain once more. But what else is new?

Wednesday Weigh in Week 88

Lots can happen in a week.

So I pretty much haven't worked out since last Wednesday. I have been trying my best not to get sick. And with two people on antibiotics in my house, that hasn't been easy. And I have just been tired. Plain and simple. Or my head hurts or my back hurts. Or both. I have been going to bed super early. And sleeping in. And now it's back to work. So I'm really needing to find a balance of working out and life. Oh and I got registered for my first college class ever. So yeah.

But now sitting here, my head is pounding and I've been up since 4:30 this morning. SO good night all! Here's to a new week!

Wednesday Weigh in Week 86

Do you ever have days where you just wake up just feeling smaller? I mean I know they are rare, and far and few in between hahaha!

But today was one of those days! I woke up and just felt different. So I grabbed my tape measurer and sure enough. My meausrements around my belly button was -1 inch! Maybe all these workouts are starting to actually do something ;) I mean I have no idea weight wise what I weigh. I'm gonna go with close to the same because my pants aren't really much looser. Or anything like that. I'm not tugging to keep my pants up or anything. But I've noticed with all the squats that my hips feel a bit better and my stomach was feeling better today :0) So I guess the patience is just waiting for the weight to come off. I have now worked out for 14 days in a row! I mean, I guess I'm not exactly eating all my workouts back, but I figure I should be seeing some sort of results by now right?

That would be my guess. As of tomorrow, I will be halfway(ish) done with my workouts for the month. That's good, cause I'm getting kind of tired of them! Haha. I have already decided what I will do differently next month. I'm not gonna try to do it all the same day. I'm going to have to break things up. I mean, in the summer I will have time to do 2 hour workouts, but not so much during the school year. There is just more going on. I want to be able to scale it down to an hour, so I can do it all in the morning and still have time to get me and the boys ready for school.

Which starts 2 weeks from today! Geesh. That summer break went fast. I thoroughly enjoyed not doing a whole lot at all! And now I have the next two weeks to get my behind in gear and get stuff done. Oh the life of a procrastinator ;)

Oh...so I did a 45 second plank today! I'm quite shocked that I'm doing this. Now granted my butt is probably too high in the air still, but I feel like my back is pretty straight? So yeah. I'm still working on that. But I'm doing it! That's halfway to the 90 seconds that it wants you to do after 30 days. So I'm feeling pretty good about being able to do 45 seconds. Even if I'm doing it "wrong" ;)

It's a non scale vicotry kind of day :0)

Wednesday weigh in week 85

Well my computer wasn't working at the time so I decided to use my phone. Needless to say this post is going to be pretty short ;-)

I have done one week of my August workout challenge. 

Yeah. 

I'm pretty sure I'm going to die. 

Either that or I might lose 10 or 15 pounds this month lol!

I think I will go for the latter. That's the goal anyway. I mean whose bright idea was it to do 200 squats all the time? 

Oh yeah. That would be me. 

Everything else seems to be going great. I'm still a little concerned that I might be doing the crunches wrong. But I have completely surprised myself with the fact that as of this morning I can do a 30 second plank. Oh. My. Goodness. That's huge! I mean who do I think I am? Hahaha. I have to repeat it tomorrow so I will see how it goes. I barely made it to 30 seconds this morning. But I knew even if I couldn't get to 90 seconds like the goal is, that I will go for as long as possible each day. 

So. I have been sweating like crazy and making sure I get my workouts in. Week one is done and now and I am on to week two. 

I found a little program that I can watermark my pictures. I got a little weirded out by a comment on a picture once and haven't posted a lot. So I might be silly copyrighting my picture but there you go. 

So this is the August workout. From Hell. Haha. That I created for myself! 

Wednesday Weigh in Week 84

Wednesday just seems to sneak up on me, but here we are again.

I'm feeling pretty good about finishing my squat challenge yesterday. And then I got a bill paid off on top of that. So it was a pretty dang good day yesterday. I even was noticing some changes in my body yesterday. In the squatting area. Haha. That's the best way that I can explain it I guess. But needless to say it's encouraging to me. Even though it took a month of squats to do it. Haha. But I will be continuing on with the squats. And then some, so I will be excited to see what the end of August is going on with my body without stepping on the scale. :)

My sister and I went mall walking last night. Haha..I have discovered why I'm not a big fan of going to the mall. I'm always trying to walk around people, they tend to walk so slow. Of course I'm not there to shop. I'm there to walk. So trying to walk around people and keep up with my sister who has longer legs than me was interesting. Of course I was only there because that's where she wanted to walk. I'm totally ok with walking outside. But at any rate we went walking for about 45 minutes and I was a little irritated that I didn't bring my water, because I was feeling it.

I'm going to need to figure out my workouts for August, because realistically I don't think that I can get the whole workout done at one time with my schedule. So I might have to break up the cardio and strength stuff just due to my time. So I will just have to try it out and see I guess.

But I am encouraged where the squat challenge took me. It took me all month to notice the change so I guess I will see what August brings.

Can't believe it's the last day of July! The year is halfway over already! How come everything seems to fly so fast?

Wednesday weigh in week 83

Oh hey, looks it's WEDNESDAY and I am posting! Haha. I will have to set a reminder or something for the summer to remember to post, since I'm not weighing in.

I guess I don't really have too much to report since I only posted on Monday. I'm still plugging away with my squat challenge. I'm getting super excited about almost finishing this. Haha. And today ended up being a rest day, so I didn't have to wake up to do any squats. Tomorrow, however, I have to do 175. And really that's technically over 200 because of the double squatting! LOL! And I really prefer just to do them in the morning and my yoga, simply so they are out of the way. I had waiting on Monday to do them when we got back from the beach and it was almost 10 at night before I finished with everything. Geesh. I'm not planning on doing that again. Done, out of the way and showered. That's how I prefer to do them!

I think I'm getting antsy about not weighing in however. I reallly wanted to weigh in this morning, and that's kind of weird. Haha. I guess cheating at the beach was a bad thing. Although with the way I've been eating, I don't really want to know the last couple of days. But then again, I kind of do.

I went shopping for some shirts yesterday and came home empty handed. I didn't want to spend the money if I wasn't completely in love with the shirt. Which I suppose is good for me? I mean yeah, I'm trying to watch my money, but it's so dang hot right now, that I am looking for some more tanks and I'm not finding them. And I fall back into the mentality of 'but I am going to lose weight and I won't even be using this shirt next year.' So I walked away. I wasn't entirely happy with the shirts that I could have gotten and I didn't want to go up any bigger in size. I ended up getting some bras that were the same size even though I should have gone up a band size, but they didn't have any. So um any waist whittling exercises that work quickly anyone? Haha. 

I'm thinking for August that I'm going to come up with my own challenge. I really liked the idea of having a workout set up and just doing it. And that the squat thing was so simple. So I'm gonna go explore pinterest a bit and see if I can come up with something to do. Something that incorporates more working out, and not just squats ;) Although I am surprised that I don't actually mind them. Of course the ones with the kicks I kind of mind haha. But only cause I have to do more. And I will see what comes of 200 squats every time would do. I mean it takes me about 20 minutes to do them without an additional workout. Oy. I can see how people easily can do 2 hour workouts LOL. I just have to find a way to do it and do it in the heat. Maybe I will have to do an am/pm kind of thing. I will have to see.

So I guess I'm off to figure something out :0)

Wednesday Weigh in week 82/30 day Squat challenge week 3

I realized that when I was heading to vacation that I hadn't posted my Wednesday weigh in post AGAIN last week. This no scale thing is throwing me off. Starting to feel like a broken record. Still need to reign in the eating, but still doing the challenge ;)

30 day squat challenge is going surprisingly well! I have finished them every day! The most I have done a day is 150. Tomorrow will be 160. And to think next Tuesday will be 200! I'm almost done with the challenge and that's kind of what excites me the most. Starting it and FINISHING it! And to say that I've done 200 squats today would be something else too ;) I have noticed that my knees are feeling better. Especially going up and down stairs. I even did my squats while we were on vacation. Ok. Nothing like hiding out from 21 of your closest family members and working out ;) Plus we did a lot of walking while we were there. So I felt pretty good. And I think with doing the challenge that I was able to walk better. My knees and my legs weren't bothering me as much. And let me tell you, there were a lot of hills/stairs in this town.

I did some crazy things this week. Haha. One of them was that we went on a whale watching adventure while we were there. Now I've gone to this town so many times and I don't think I've ever gone out on the boat before. So we paid our money, got on the boat and away we went. We were told up front was the best place so obviously my friend and I went there ;) Well for an hour it was all fun. We actually saw a whale several times! And had the coolest tour guide. Well he told us that when we turned around that we up front were going to get pretty wet. Most everyone left and went to the back. Do you think we went back. Uh no. My friend and I got COMPLETELY drenched. I'm talking head to toe soaked. We screamed and laughed the whole way back. And then felt like I had gained 10 pounds because of my jeans being soaked. Needless to say we had to go back to the house to change before we went out and did anything else :0)

And then we ended up at Ripley's Believe it or not. Where believe it or not, I cheated on my no scale summer. Yeah. I'm just gonna go ahead and admit it. I could have covered the part where it said what I weighed on the earth. But I glanced over. Needless to say I weigh 90 pounds on the moon and about 12 pounds on Pluto. Which doesn't even count because it's not a planet anymore. But whatever. I do have to say I was a little disappointed. You know how you automatically start justifying in your head. Well I have to take off 2 pounds just for clothes and oh jeez, this is a heavy sweatshirt because it's only 60 degrees here and blah blah blah. And it was in the middle of the day and yada yada yada. So so far I haven't gone down a whole lot. BUT the number was lower than the last time I weighed in. So that's at least a bonus!

Needless to say, we just got back from vacation a few hours ago, and I'm not ready to go back to the real world. But I have to. I have to say I have a little fear about posting my pictures on my blog. I need to figure out a little watermark thing before I'm gonna do that, but I do want to post some soon. Goals goals goals :0)

Wednesday weigh in Week 81/30 day squat challenge week 2

Wow, I think I almost fell off the face of the earth ;)

Wednesday was super busy and I just ended up not being able to post, as well as thursday and friday, and well you get the point ;)

Still not up to par with my food. But not necessarily completely over doing it? I still don't "feel" like I look like I have lost weight however. Which is a little discouraging. But I really just need to really get into gear besides the challenge and get some workouts done.

That being said!! I finished week 2 of the 30 day squat challenge. Wow. Today I did 125 squats. And yes by the end of them, I was not squatting down all the way! Haha. But so far my legs feel good. I'm really attributing this to the yoga stretches I do afterwards. There are days that my knee feels swollen from what I am doing, but after those first 3 days of doing the squats I have yet to be sore. Which I'm surely pleased about! I mean let's be honest. Who wants to be sore after a workout? Haha

The challenge this week is going to be getting my squats in while I'm on vacation. Yes. The Beach is calling my name. Along with 20 other members of my family ;) In one house. I mean let's just all be crazy together! You agree? Sweet! We are going to be there for 4 nights. So I have 2-3 days of doing my squats while I am there. I will have one rest day. And I will probably do the one at home when we get home that last day. So really I guess that only leaves 2 days. Which I'm sure is do able. I mean what's doing 140 and 150 squats in front of your family like? Now I just have to figure out if I want to actually take my yoga mat down there, or just do my stretches on the floor ;)

But for now, my happy place is calling my name. I know because I've already started packing. And that my dear friends is a miracle in and of itself!

Wednesday Weigh in Week 80

80 weeks. Wow. I'm just gonna say that I really thought I was going to be done by now. I was gonna be at my goal weight. And life would be great. Fast forward to my life. Haha..yeah right..

Anyways. So here we are Wednesday again. I really almost forgot that it was "weigh in" day. And that I should be posting. I guess I posted yesterday, so wow..2 posts in a row.

I am on day 3 of my 30 day squat challenge. I am super glad tomorrow is a rest day. I think I can mentally handle 3 days in a row of squats if I get one day off ;) Today I did 60 squats. And so far, only the front of my legs are sore. So I'm pretty happy that my back isn't injured and life seems better.

I am slowly getting off of dairy and gluten again. At least backing down of what I was doing daily. So that's a start. And I even threw in a couple of fruits this week. Yah. Haha..

Not much else going on for me. I am going on a mini road trip to pick up a friend on Saturday :0) Just a quick overnight trip, and I am considering going tomorrow for a free concert an hour away. Either that or I am going to have a vegging 4th of July. I have a couple of options of things to do but I haven't decided yet :)

Happy 4th of July everyone!